The temple remains.

Fragments of past transmissions echo below.

Category: Email Archives

  • The difficulty of being “musical”

    I’m gonna lay this out there first:

    Being musical is not hard.

    So…why do you think it’s hard? You think it’s hard because you were told it’s hard.

    Think back to early experiences when you first realized that being musical was hard:

    • Maybe you had a music teacher who told you that you weren’t being musical.

    • Maybe you listened to a recording of yourself playing and thought it didn’t sound musical.

    • Maybe you heard a musician you admire say that being musical is hard and then you assumed you couldn’t do it without having the experience they have.

    What would happen if you questioned all of this?

    The music teacher who told you that you weren’t being musical: what if they were in a bad mood that day? What if they just didn’t like your idea of how music should sound? What if you were distracted by something and it affected your playing and they interpreted it as “you weren’t being musical”?

    The recording of yourself you listened to: what if you were in a bad mood while listening to it?

    The great musician who said being musical takes years of experience: what if they’re only talking about their level of musicality at their current age? What if, when they were 9 years old, they also played musically (but musically for a 9-year-old)?

    Are you sure the problem is that you weren’t being musical? Are you sure playing musically is difficult?

    So…what’s the deal? Why does it seem hard?

    Try to look at this separately from everything anyone else might say about your playing. Also, try to look at it separately from anything you might say about your own playing.

    You’re all way too biased.

    If you can listen to music and you can feel yourself respond to it, if you understand it, if it moves you, then you’re musical enough. You don’t need more than that.

    The trick is to allow that to come through while you play.

    You’re already doing it. You just need to stop doing the other stuff.

    —Michael

  • Why “anxiety” is so hard to fix

    In the West, we separate the mind and the body. This is counterproductive. There’s not a strict line between “psychological” problems and “physical” problems.

    We’re taught that anxiety is a problem because anxiety feels bad. I want you to question that.

    Does anxiety really feel bad? If you say “of course”, then tell me: what specifically feels bad about it?

    Here are some symptoms of anxiety (according to the Mayo Clinic):

    • Having an increased heart rate.

    • Breathing rapidly (hyperventilation).

    • Sweating.

    • Feeling weak or tired.

    Are you going to tell me you can’t think of any “good” feelings that involve these same symptoms? Of course not.

    The feelings are neutral.

    So, if you want to fix your anxiety problem by trying to eliminate anxiety, you’re already barking up the wrong tree.

    What, then, is your actual problem?

    —Michael

  • Why we hate making mistakes

    Musicians, artists, writers and other creators deal with problems like these:

    • Perfectionism

    • Performance anxiety

    • Tension

    • Writer’s block

    • Low self-confidence

    They’re all based on a common source: a fear of making mistakes.

    That fear is usually learned in early childhood, but it sticks with us throughout our lives.

    I remember being 4 years old and a girl in my class made fun of me for coloring outside the lines. Now, as an adult, there is some fear of making mistakes while drawing.

    It starts off as fear of social rejection. From an evolutionary perspective, this fear makes sense. Babies will die if they are rejected by their parents.

    Fear of social rejection becomes the motivator for learning lots of skills.

    Social rejection isn’t as deadly as it might have been to our ancestors. Yet, in 2021, we find it difficult to practice our creative skills because we’re worried about what other people will think if we mess up.

    That’s messed up, isn’t it?

    —Michael

    P.S. I wanted to let you know about a new program I am going to offer soon. It addresses this very issue. If you’re a musician or an artist or a writer or anyone else who practices a skill and suffers from perfectionism, etc., you might be interested in this.

  • Read this if you’re a perfectionist

    If you’re a perfectionist, you must meditate. You won’t get rid of perfectionism otherwise.

    Perfectionism is an anxiety disorder. You’re afraid of making mistakes.

    The only cure for an anxiety disorder is exposure therapy. That’s when you deliberately expose yourself to the thing you’re afraid of.

    However, this is hard to do. When you expose yourself to something you’re afraid of, you’ll want to run and hide. Then, you’ll go your whole life saying, “yeah, yeah, I know I should just suck it up and deal with it.”

    So, how do you get to the point where exposure therapy is possible?

    You must learn to see the thing you’re afraid of as being only sensory experience.

    For example, if you’re afraid to publish a blog post because you’re afraid of criticism, you can learn to see the fear of criticism as merely images and sounds in your head and sensations in your body. Once you see it this way, it’s much easier to be willing to expose yourself to it.

    Rejection is hard to deal with. A “story about rejection” is easier to deal with. “Still frames from a movie about rejection” are even easier to deal with.

    This is where meditation comes in.

    Meditation teaches you how to view your experiences as sensory phenomena. Without meditation, you’ll be too attached to your stories and the exposure therapy won’t work and you’ll be stuck with perfectionism forever.

    —Michael

  • This is how cults recruit members

    Your friends and family and teachers are out to screw you over.

    Don’t believe me? Try doing something unexpected (but good for you), and watch what happens.

    They will freak out.

    Don’t let that stop you. Keep going.

    Your mind will also try to stop you. It will tell you about all the horrible things that will happen if you don’t listen.

    Your mind is not your friend.

    Remember where your mind came from in the first place. It was programmed by your friends and family and teachers. You learned to fear the unknown because you felt it would keep you safe from social rejection. And remember, when you’re a baby, social rejection means certain death.

    That’s why you take your mind so seriously.

    But…this is a problem. We call it “perfectionism” or “lack of confidence” or “living in fear” or “overthinking” or a hundred other names.

    It’s all the same, though. You’re taking your mind too seriously.

    (because you don’t want to die in the woods as a baby)

    Well, you’re not a baby anymore. You are free to say “thanks mind, but I can handle this on my own right now.”

    —Michael

  • I don’t understand why I should meditate everyday

    I got a question:

    “Why should I meditate everyday?”

    Good question, thanks for asking.

    You should meditate everyday because, if you don’t, you will suck at meditation. It’s a skill that takes practice. It’s not something you do once and then you’re done. You must spend many hours on it.

    Let’s make it concrete.

    There’s a blog article by Ben Fishel titled “A Ph.D. in Happiness: What 10,000 Hours of Meditation Actually Does to Your Brain.” You can look it up on Google and read what he says.

    He breaks down what might happen after a certain number of hours. For example:

    • After 100 hours of meditation, you can expect “less stress and anxiety, improved immune system and energy”.

    • After 1,000 hours of meditation, you can expect “almost superhuman focus compared to coworkers, increased capacity to experience love”.

    • After 5,000 hours of meditation, you can expect “much of your ego will dissolve, much more control over automatic reactions, boredom won’t occur”.

    His words, not mine.

    My words are:

    I don’t care if you meditate everyday, or if you get your 10,000 hours in all at once and then quit forever.

    But, the clock is ticking.

    —Michael

>