You can help me stop obsessing

Hey, if you weren’t aware, I have a meditation course. It’s called No Problem, and it’s awesome. If you really cared about me, you would buy it. If you haven’t bought it yet, I’m curious to know why. Reply to this email and let me know. I’m literally spending hours and hours trying to figure out the answer to this question on my own, and it would be super-helpful if you could just tell me (there’s no wrong answer).

Now that I’ve got that out of the way, here’s the email I meant to send:

This is an exclusive cult. You’re a special person for being a member. You should feel special, too.

At the same time, I’m a human being. That means I’m never satisfied. I always want more.

More cult members, more money, more attention, more fame, more power.

This is how human beings work. We’re never satisfied.

We learned as kids that we shouldn’t acknowledge this fact, that there’s something wrong with being unsatisfied.

We should be grateful, appreciative, content with what we have, right?

Let me know if you figure that one out.

And, even if you are unsatisfied, you’re not supposed to complain about it, right?

Yeah, OK.

I’m not interested. I’m just a whiny cult leader.